the weekend with j wasn't bad at all. i was anxious for three weeks prior to his arrival and thought of all the unimaginable scenarios that might happen between us. he didn't want to go around the city anymore. he said he's seen it. so, we just stayed home downloading mp3s and burning cds. scanning and searching for music all day. there's only one thing we have in common. our same taste for music. that's all. well.... some other things too, like smoking, drinking, and billiards. so, anyway... it was nice of him to fly all the way from LA just to see me. i'm touched. well.... flattered actually. those sorts of efforts would make any person feel special. give him credit perhaps for the length he went just for me. if i didn't know better, i'd probably feel happy that he came. but i know what it takes to move someone. believe me. been there. it's going out of your way---- wanting to be with someone just to be closer and nearer.... whatever it takes. That! That would make me feel special. so i'll just leave it at that. i don't want to sound cynical. but with men, i need to. LOL.